it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
have you ever been in a public bathroom and someone walked in, and you played "Fat or Crying" based on her breathing?
I wish i was in the wii world.
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I turn the corner to find her walking in the front door in a tee-shirt, two different shoes and no pants. All she said to me was "I'm sad"
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Some advice...don't play drunk rock em sock em robots. With actual people. I have bruises EVERYWHERE.
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
