Ok let me ask a question, does aderall make women less apt to have sex?
Cause it just destroys penises
Was that inappropriate? I can't gauge these things anymore
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
so i had a hang over on saturday and i stayed in the shower for 4 hours, then crawled out, skimpered to my bed, and some kid i didnt know was sleeping in it
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
Fell asleep in the library, woke up because I almost let out a sleep fart. That was close.
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
my roommate would be appalled if she knew how many times i've peed in the kitchen sink
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
Randomize
