i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
Last night you told her she was rocking the beer gut. Still wondering why you have that black eye?
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
My dad just passed me a joint.. this is a turning point in my life.
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
There are too many people on this bus for it to be even REMOTELY okay that I'm wearing a puke covered sweater
aaaaaand im pretty certain i told that boy i just met that "his balls better be out tomorrow"
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
I am a good friend because I got you a bagel. I am a bad friend because I ate half of it.
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
