Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Dude im not sure whos apartment i woke up in but i just showered here and their shampoo in phenomenal
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
She got the hiccups while deep throating me. It was epic. Once in a lifetime experience.
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
Randomize
