sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
remember the used condom we threw behind my bed? my mom found it and is accusing me and making a big deal out of it,
Haha! You pissed me off, so I actually told her to go look behind your bed. Good thing I moved to Nevada, so your dad can't kick my ass. Good luck bitch.
I'm so horny
I have no idea who this is, but I'm up for a lecture on self-respect
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Just found out I reached my $2500 deductible and I have a $5 million dollar cap on my health insurance. Let's get drunk and do something recklessly stupid tonight.
she's walking down the hall in a thong and one flip flop and one ugg
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
I was just told that I'm the Sherlock Holmes of drunken sex. I'll take it.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Randomize