ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
apparently i saved myself a memo last night titled "cake" and all it says is "i love it so much"
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
I'm sitting on your porch drinking wine from the bottle. Just so your new neighbors know what kind of people are in the neighborhood
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
Randomize
