I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
You hooked up with another girl while you were with me. You were literally holding my hand while you did it.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I AM SAFE. EVERYTHING IS FOG. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.
saying that you may be able to suck the gay out of me was just my way of getting a blowjob...thank you for the valiant effort.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
God, for the last time, no I did not break my nose doing a keg-stand just for a nose job.
Just start grabbing cocks. It can't go wrong! Just say you thought you knew him and wanted to check.
Please write a memoir and name it "Game Boy and Dick Stuff"
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
We watched X-Files, ate pizza, and he played with my butt. It was a pretty standard Monday.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Randomize
