Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
its good she wears the same dress to all the weddings so we can track how fat she's really gotten
so glad i banged her when she was skinny
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
I'm drinkin whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
All I want to do is ice my pussy, but then my husband would probably infer that I was not at a business meeting last night.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I'm so sorry to hear about your grandmother. Also how many grams are in an eighth?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
Randomize