I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
we saw you sitting at the door of the dorm trashed, wrapped in DANGER tape with a stolen balloon around your wrist
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
This drive is very scenic
And I'm chugging whiskey in the back
As you should, soak in all this country has to offer
Dude I'm so clean right now. Like I feel insulted that I can pass a piss test.
40 year old guy made out with me last night while I had French fries in my mouth
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I need water and some morals
I came home and my mom goes "why are you barefoot and where the hell are your shoes?" and I replied "I have French fries"
Randomize
