do you know how bad I want you right now?
As bad as i want you to stop texting me?
is that a hint?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
My idea of sleeping together involves doing the Humpty Hump. Her idea of sleeping together focused more on being fully clothed on the opposite sides of a king sized bed.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
The fact that both my ribs are severely bruised from shoving flasks in my bra might be a validation of my mothers alcoholic accusation
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Be still, my beating vagina.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
You're going to literally shit your fucking unholy pants when Jesus rides in with his dual light-sabers on his velociraptor and cleaves you in half.
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize