There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
He legit asked if he could come over for a hug. I feel like I've been booty called by a 12 year old.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
I think I will always strangely appreciate as well as kick ass at stoned dishes. Like for the rest of my life. Thank you slave job at Starbucks.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
TJ is going to paint me in a Patriots Jersey he can paint you in an eagle jersey. Did this last year and got so much dick.
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Randomize
