Wanted to apologize for chris browning you when you were on my computer.
I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Dude with the Beatles haircut just got his pilots license and wants to take us up to do a case race mid flight. Don't tell me networking is unnecessary.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I woke up to find his roommate face down on the couch with no pants on, with a sticky note that said "was lost but now am found"
Im chasing shots of tequila with chocolate milk right now. by myself. its nasty, but I've had worse in tjere the past couple days, so ill take it.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Randomize
