Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
There's only two more days left to say you saw me naked this year.....I'll bring the booze, you got all of next year to rationalize why.
She said she didn't feel right fucking on her parents dining room table I grabbed the only thing around bubblewrap she blew me for creativity
Hey, how are you?
No. You're dead to me, you hamster stealing slutbag.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
