Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
The freshman next to me just said "I was rocking out on my way here to Dave Matthews..." I wish I would have passed this class the first time.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
Middle of vacation, he walked into an audition for a Broadway musical in a drunken stupor. I think he got the part.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
