so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
So I'm pretty sure when I was giving a Birthday Blow J, he went to grab my boob, but grabbed a fat roll and asked "You're not wearing a bra?"
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
So, how do I go about conveying: I'm sorry, yet very glad she is having my abortion. Via text msg?
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
Ummm so does anybody remember me stopping to get my ear peirced last night and make an earring out of a staple? Or did I just somehow lay on this thing and ram it through my ear?
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
The black hole just entered the party man, I can literally see guys starting to move towards her.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
I don't know if I'm having early flu symptoms, a miscarriage, or am badly hungover. Web md agrees.
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