She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I feel bad for the person that has to clean the dishes that I peed on last night.
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Pretty sure that I got the MVP of wedding reception... woke up on the bench in the hallway of a hotel and we did NOT start the night there.
I can't tell if they're having sex or watching the beach scene from Saving Private Ryan. All I know is I hear explosions and men screaming and crying
Dude between pissing everywhere and all of those frogs, that bathroom got wrecked.
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
Well I'm half drunk in a green tutu at a chipotle. So pretty good parade.
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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