if i died would you start the facebook group?
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
Unintionally got shitfaced at study group this week. The waitress brought out a fishbowl of long Island iced tea. Challenge accepted.
Imagine how different my life would be if I could find a man who gave me more pleasure than pizza at 2am when I'm drunk.
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
Randomize
