3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
well, atleast the road to alcoholism is fun.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
have to get expensive furniture. after that study abroad now at least six things at ikea are named after guys i slept with
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Im at a south american orphan benefit auction drinking stoli in a coffee mug, this is what my life has become, thanks a lot community college
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
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