Nicole vs. Life
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
I'd just like to inform all involved that walking into a liquor store holding a milk crate at the beginning of a night as stock ends badly
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
He's in the same dorm as me. We are sharing a laundry room, gym, and cafeteria. I'VE ALREADY COMMITTED DORMCEST AND MOVE-IN DAY ISN'T UNTILL NEXT WEEK!!!!
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
I'm not even 100% sure what it is, but if it involves Thor and Doritos, I'm in
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize
