one two three fourrrrnication!
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he'll be my respectable boyfriend for tksgiving and i'll be his non-slutty girlfriend for christmas.
and then ....
he stays my gay friend and my parents think i'm not a slut.
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Please come quick there are people in suits here judging me
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
If we don't have crazy animal sex tonight at least twice, I'll know he's cheating on me.
Who wouldn't want crazy animal sex with you?!
A cheater.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Sex. Target parking lot. I really am the mayor.
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