it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
She used the word "fragged" in proper context. tell me that's not bust-nut hot.
We went into lab today and when no one was looking i touched our cadaver's penis!
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
I'm trying to behave my vagina this week so I can at least pretend I'm honoring the sanctity of marriage
Someone explain to me why I woke up to find a stolen shopping cart in my room...
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