idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
