you're like a bully in the Christmas story
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I woke up under a table, with a huge Mexican sombrero, a box of 120 doughnuts and a bloody nose. It all screams success.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
I didn't even have time to sit down and the nurse was like: ''You've been having unprotected sex.'' HOW DOES SHE KNOW?!?
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
We didn't mean to put a petting zoo in the elevator.
I'm always down for nudity.
He ate me out on a washing machine in the 24 hour laundromat. Whoever watches that security camera footage is getting a show!
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