My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I'd climb him like a horny MILF spider monkey.
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
My dad accidentally texted me asking if I had weed...
Maybe you should say yes, and you guys can like bond or something...
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
Randomize