Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
Just realized our kids will one day call us old because we were around when texting came about. I'm sad.
Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
It's safe to say that bucket of tequila night can NEVER HAPPEN AGAIN.
I repeat the shot was ON FIRE. I am never going to a pirate bar again.
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
omg i wish you could see the front of my car.
There's literally a dust print of your body and your arm trying to hold on and the other one where your fingers visibly dragged down the hood.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
He pulled a bucket of fried chicken out of his backpack as a peace offering. Under the chicken was a rainbow bag of weed. We're dating again.
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
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