Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
This went bad. Everyone is crying, i dont know why and I am really uncomfortable.
You do realize I got a panda tattooed on my ass just to get you laid, right?
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
do you know how hard it is to bring up the "what do I do if you conk out while we're fucking" conversation while maintaining the dignity of.the narcaleptic girl you just met?
I'm bored enough im considering taking up his offer to turn me straight just to kill time until the lasagna is out of the oven
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
this is the second night in a row i've fucked a guy i met on craigslist. and it wasn't even a post for sex. i posted a housing ad. A HOUSING AD
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
