he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
at first I thought it was funny, but looking at it now, it screams "dramatic" and "medicated wipes."
They're sharing a mixed drink at a bar with straws...its like a disney movie with booze
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
my quiz for the book was only 2 questions and my one answer was sorry and then a sad face
Gosh, I don't even have that. Let alone someone to tie me up and whip me with Twizzlers.
Mostly i might never get belligerent again because im gonna have to keep track of a diamond ring.
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
he said "i'm the cat whisperer, watch". he took a hit from the pipe, grabbed the cat and blew the smoke in its ear. he grinned and the cat started purring. it was magnificent
Randomize
