if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
Turns out you can't chew it over with twix in real life
Dude I've never seen anyone get slapped that hard
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
Secondly, that waffle is lost for good. I have no fucking idea where that bitch is
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Just in case the world ends tomorrow, I have an emergency contact group of booty calls I can send a quick "let's fuck" to before I die.
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
