how could I be having a bad time, I have the three most important things in life: Goat cheese, Xanax, and Saved By the Bell Re-runs.
she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
8am blowjobs give a whole new meaning to morning breath..
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Dilemas of the modern woman: deciding whether or not to write on your ex's wall for his birthday. This is serious.
I feel like the devil is trying to impregnate me through my eyeballs.
I feel so nauseous and all I want is string cheese. My life never makes sense.
Honestly after an incomprehensible political rant yoga seems like the best option at 2 am
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
Randomize
