I often get tempted to walk up to her drunk ass and say, "shouldn't you be taking care of your kid?"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I may have to marry her. She is smarter than me and has a six figure job and doesn't want to have kids. All I have to be is a trophy husband.
I want to put in my resignation as an adult. From now on I will be spending my time drinking beer and skiing.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Randomize
