they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
Smoking bowl and applying to community college. I now know how I got here.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
We are magical, pot smoking, smart as hell, single as fuck, woodland dolphins.
Admittedly shitfaced... I have two questions. 1)why is the fan in my bathroom on? (Sub-text: is there a ghost?). 2) is your underwear really argyle?
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
Just scratched my head and I basically rained glitter.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
Randomize
