My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
