oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Want any specific kind of beer?
Yeah. Alcohol flavor.
Got it. Anything but Miller.
it's like, God thought about making her pretty then changed his mind at the last second
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
Trust me. Drunk Scrabble is not a good idea. Arguments over the legitimacy of the word "Pickle" break out, things are said, friendships are ruined. It's ugly.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
Have you had sex with a man from New Zealand? No? Then your input is invalid.
I fell asleep giving a handjob, had a sex dream about giving a handjob, and woke up giving a handjob. Life.
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Officially hit an ultimate low today. I was so hung-over I threw up on the ground in front of the jousting display in the London tower. But on a positive note, Brits are very understanding when you vomit on their history.
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
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