What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
You said eat breakfast. So i poured Baileys on top of m&m's. It taste just like like cereal I swear.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
don't worry i won't let him get attached. I put on my Hulk onesie after sex and yelled I SMASHED YOU. never seen a guy looked so confused.
Well I just put wine in my tea
Pain in my heart, regret in my vagina
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
please don't forget about the bread in the toilet i am absolutely not dealing with that
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
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