I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
I've come to realize that I need a break from life when I just tried to use my address numbers as the cook time on the microwave
Stuck in the Minneapolis airport for 3 hours with an expense budget and a wine bar. This could get out of hand quickly.
Randomize
