I think I just saw the travelocity gnome in leather chaps.
Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
If I had a mugshot, I would totally use it as my main picture on Tinder, just to keep it interesting.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Randomize
