I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I'm drunk at the doctor. It's not that fun. Overrated in fact.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
I had sex with a boy who lives in a closet, that's like having sex with Harry Potter, right?
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Is it weird that the girl I'm fucking just wished me luck on my date tonight?
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
It's not even noon yet and I just fucked my professor's son in the psych lab..it's gonna be a great day.
Randomize