I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
She tied me up with her honor cords...
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
I asked him to explain what he meant by "hooking up" in paragraph form
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
I'm by myself. some Midwest chick is hitting on me because I gave her a deviled egg. I need the distraction.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize