Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
Is it rude to ask for an autograph after giving him a blowjob in their hotel's hot tub?
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
At about 2:30 i found you passed out in my closet with your face covered in cheese whiz
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
I just found out why people like handcuffs.
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
Let’s not dwell on the negatives. I have a fat ass and suck dick well.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
