Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
I believe the question is can one ever have too many vibrators?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I’m not dating him for his personality. I’m dating him so I can steal his dog.
my mom is drunk and is trying to get me to take a picture of her ass. what is life?
Randomize
