Goal for tonight: Make one last drunken mistake for the semester.
i now know from two sources i am better at making out and giving head than she is. and not by a little either.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Randomize
