Sponge bath it is.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
Had to use the product locator on on the four loko website to find them at home. Got to go in the backroom of a grocery store to get them. Dedication.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Before you become official, we should get a hotel room and fuck our brains out. Sort of like a going away party for your penis.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I'm far too poor to be letting my hookups wear my shirts home. I'm down to about a total of 8 shirts and have no intention of buying more
Tim is a child that you physically can't love because he makes it hard for you to even find anything redeeming about him so you debate leaving him forever at the gas station.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
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