Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
and everytime i fart i feel like in your heart, you can hear it
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
All i remember is people cheering me on to drink faster than the dog, out of the dog's bowl. I just couldn't stop.
Oh I woke up in my neighbors garage using one of their sleeping bags, as my neighbor was doing laundry in there.
Ideas for halloween. We need simple yet hilarious. Cheap yet effective. Slutty yet acceptable. Go.
Some random walked into our tent, woke her up and said "Harry Potter must not go back to Hogwarts!"
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Being an adult is fun. You can experience a break up, then go fuck someone else in the woods.
Getting a lap dance from a girl you went to high school with really isn't as awkward as you'd think
And she called me out by name, nothing could have made it more awkward but it ended up not being that bad
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
Randomize
