Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
he had a TATTOO on his FACE. a tattoo on your face basically says "i've gone as far in society as i'd like to."
its taking every last moral i have not to steal this bike
you still have morals?
Well actually itd just be too hard to ride the bike with this large rake i just stole
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Trying to figure out when's a good time to take acid and not tell anyone and see how long it takes people to notice
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Just got 20% off at the liquor store. How you ask? I asked if there was an "I got divorced today" discount.
I'm just trying to absorb as much of the fluids from the carpet as I can.
Having a heartfelt conversation with your boyfriends mom while sexting her son. If that's not multitasking, I don't know what is.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
i spent my Thursday drinking before noon and not wearing pants
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