id be glad to
girls just need to accept the fact that i'm going to make out with their boyfriends
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
You can't mix blow jobs, bacon, and Star Wars.
A) just did. And b-z) that sounds like a great Sunday morning.
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
Who's the easier target... Bandages on the knees, tramp stamp, or bra showing? Not in the mood to work for it tonight.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Finally hooked up with Ryan. Now I know why they call him “Beast Mode”. So. Many. Orgasms.
Randomize
