its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
then he tried to convert me to islam
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
So the stripper who poured a beer on my head also gives great head. Even she doesn't know why she went home with me. No more mystery shot challenges.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Whenever I'm not in the mood and don't want to go to bed swampy, I just strategically suck him off during the second period intermission of the Cup playoffs and he leaves me alone and does the dishes. It's a win-win.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Randomize