Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(832): View more from Houston, Texas

Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.

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(215): View more from Pennsylvania

why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'

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(707): View more from California

that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it

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(513): View more from Ohio

So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?

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(779): View more from Illinois

I smell like gasoline and adventure.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

He went 'unicorn hunting' and lost a fight with a fence. That's how he ended up in the ER.

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(910): View more from North Carolina

Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up

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(813): View more from Florida

So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.

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