Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
she said your name and I thought she was asking me to motorboat her. Best. Miscommunication.Ever.
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
I wish i could be on x for the rest of my life.
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
