The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.
I told him I wanted to have sex to "halleluiah", he suggested the poke-rap.
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Never has jello made me angry to the point of drinking. But here I am.
Yea...Let's just say I gave her the best 3 and half minutes of her life then she took a 40 minute cab ride home that she paid for...
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Um. I just realized I still have a beer in my purse from last night. I'm at work. I am so classy.
Randomize
