I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
That UFC fighter fucked me so hard I have what can only be described as a "cuntcussion"
I was thinking more like a "sorry you can hear us, but I'm having the best sex of my life" cake
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
Maybe they'll dismiss me from jury duty after they smell beer on me. You can't keep me in a cage and then give me an hour and a half long lunch break next to a beer fest and expect sobriety.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
