I woke up this morning under my fitted sheet and my legs through the sleeves of my sweater.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
I thought about farting is his face when he was going down on me last nite.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
I'm in the freezer. Shit took away any trace of hangover outa my body.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Randomize